No man can dig his toes into the carpet while watching TV
No man can go to a fashion show with his "boy"
No man can get "butterflies" when meeting another man...famous or not
No man take cell phone pics and name the album "photoshoot"
No man can own a Snuggie
No man can say.."man the thing I miss most about playing ball, is the locker room"
No man can win a bear at a carnival and keep it
No man can ask another man to meet him for Sushi
No man can be in a bookclub
No man can have any kind of ass ointment in his cabinet
Thank You
Showing posts with label Man Law Monday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Man Law Monday. Show all posts
Monday, September 21, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can have an Air Freshener that is Fruit Explosion scented
No man can pull his bare heels out of his shoes while sitting down
No man can say anything bad about a Porn Star
No man can take his son to cheerleading practice
No group of men can have a "Boys Night Out"
No man can ask another man "Yo, what you wearing to the club?"
No man can say "take me to jail, I'm ready to go back"
No man can have letters taller than 1 inch on his jeans
No man can lay out by the pool
No man can have the "Oprah Flap" under his arm
Thank You
No man can pull his bare heels out of his shoes while sitting down
No man can say anything bad about a Porn Star
No man can take his son to cheerleading practice
No group of men can have a "Boys Night Out"
No man can ask another man "Yo, what you wearing to the club?"
No man can say "take me to jail, I'm ready to go back"
No man can have letters taller than 1 inch on his jeans
No man can lay out by the pool
No man can have the "Oprah Flap" under his arm
Thank You
Monday, June 15, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can suck his teeth and say..."Ugghh...I hate the Lakers, they always win"
No man can say, "I wonder if Shannon Brown is related to Chris, every time I see one I think about the other"
No man can say..."I just don't like Kobe because he is arrogant"...news flash. He is worth 100's of millions of dollars...think about how arrogant you get when you get fresh haircut
No man can say..."Even his puppet is arrogan"
No man can own a Lakers bedroom set
No man can say..."Dang...they foulin Dwight Howard everytime, I know he got big shoulders and all, but damn"
No man can talk shit about Kobe's daughters' outfits after the game (No matter how Mexican it was)
No man can wear Laker's flip flops without socks
No man can say..."Man Andrew Bynum got a high butt"
No man can say that the Lakeshow aint the shit!!!
INGLEWOOD 310 LAKESHOW ALL DAY...
No man can say, "I wonder if Shannon Brown is related to Chris, every time I see one I think about the other"
No man can say..."I just don't like Kobe because he is arrogant"...news flash. He is worth 100's of millions of dollars...think about how arrogant you get when you get fresh haircut
No man can say..."Even his puppet is arrogan"
No man can own a Lakers bedroom set
No man can say..."Dang...they foulin Dwight Howard everytime, I know he got big shoulders and all, but damn"
No man can talk shit about Kobe's daughters' outfits after the game (No matter how Mexican it was)
No man can wear Laker's flip flops without socks
No man can say..."Man Andrew Bynum got a high butt"
No man can say that the Lakeshow aint the shit!!!
INGLEWOOD 310 LAKESHOW ALL DAY...
Monday, June 8, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Man Law Monday
Cookout Edition
No man can eat a naked sausage
No man can bring a pound cake to a cookout
No man can ask another man how he "prepares his chicken"
No man can complain that there are not enough vegetables at the cookout
No man can wear an apron that says "kiss the chef" at a cookout with a bunch of dudes
No man can drink a Bud Light Lime
No man can hope that another man brought a plate of his specialty
No man can request that everyone play Charades
No man can pass out flyers to his poetry reading at the cookout
No 2 men can walk to the cookout and say in unison, "We bought potato salad"
Thank You
No man can eat a naked sausage
No man can bring a pound cake to a cookout
No man can ask another man how he "prepares his chicken"
No man can complain that there are not enough vegetables at the cookout
No man can wear an apron that says "kiss the chef" at a cookout with a bunch of dudes
No man can drink a Bud Light Lime
No man can hope that another man brought a plate of his specialty
No man can request that everyone play Charades
No man can pass out flyers to his poetry reading at the cookout
No 2 men can walk to the cookout and say in unison, "We bought potato salad"
Thank You
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can walk out fo jail w/ fresh braids
No man can eat a Manwich
No man can have small birds printed on his shirt
No man can watch Men's tennis
No man can use another man's face towel
No man can use Vidal Sassoon Shampoo
No man can be on the NutraSystem points diet
No man can have these symbols in his text signature *~Ballin is My Hobby~*
No man can wear a shirt that shows his entire collarbone
No man can walk his dog in a dog park
No man can eat a Manwich
No man can have small birds printed on his shirt
No man can watch Men's tennis
No man can use another man's face towel
No man can use Vidal Sassoon Shampoo
No man can be on the NutraSystem points diet
No man can have these symbols in his text signature *~Ballin is My Hobby~*
No man can wear a shirt that shows his entire collarbone
No man can walk his dog in a dog park
Monday, May 11, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can sit at the edge of the pool and dip his feet in
No man can ask for Lavender Car Freshener
No man can say "Oh heyyyy" when answering the phone
No man can purchase a Day 26 CD
No man can complain about his nails getting dirty
No man can turn pass a women's volleyball game on tv. (Must watch for at least 5 minutes)
No man can lay out by the pool
No man can eat cotton candy at the amusement park
No man can use toilet tissue that comes w/ Aloe
No man can have a large collection of keychains
Thank You
No man can ask for Lavender Car Freshener
No man can say "Oh heyyyy" when answering the phone
No man can purchase a Day 26 CD
No man can complain about his nails getting dirty
No man can turn pass a women's volleyball game on tv. (Must watch for at least 5 minutes)
No man can lay out by the pool
No man can eat cotton candy at the amusement park
No man can use toilet tissue that comes w/ Aloe
No man can have a large collection of keychains
Thank You
Monday, May 4, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can order a medium fruit cup
No man can have all men as his T-Mobile Fave 5
No man can say they dont like girl on girl porn
No man can utter the words, "damn I forgot a lime for my Corona"
No 2 men can go puppy shopping at the animal shelter
No man can be more excited about his wedding then he is his batchelor party
No man can buy another man a drink and tell the bartender, "Make it strong"
No man can walk another man to his car
No man can say an outfit makes him look chunky
No man can invite another man to is company Christmas Party
No man can have all men as his T-Mobile Fave 5
No man can say they dont like girl on girl porn
No man can utter the words, "damn I forgot a lime for my Corona"
No 2 men can go puppy shopping at the animal shelter
No man can be more excited about his wedding then he is his batchelor party
No man can buy another man a drink and tell the bartender, "Make it strong"
No man can walk another man to his car
No man can say an outfit makes him look chunky
No man can invite another man to is company Christmas Party
Monday, April 27, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can compliment how well the pastor's suit fits
No man can ask another man if he can, "change his oil"
No 2 men can be in the same slot of a revolving door
No man can tell another man that is not a professional athelete that he is a beast
No man can ask the bootleg movie man at the barbershop, "Ay yo, you got that Obsessed joint?"
No man can buy a Nutrageous
No man can have a crease in his jeans
No man can tell another man he has "fresh breath"
No man can text a chick saying, "You hurt my feelings by not answering my call"
No man can tell another man that he dropped something, then watch him pick it up
If you're in the ATL this weekend check me out at SugarHill in the Underground this Sunday May 3rd from 7-9pm. Snack Pack Improv Comedy. Click the link to check out the last show. Hit me for advance tix.
http://vimeo.com/4002015
No man can ask another man if he can, "change his oil"
No 2 men can be in the same slot of a revolving door
No man can tell another man that is not a professional athelete that he is a beast
No man can ask the bootleg movie man at the barbershop, "Ay yo, you got that Obsessed joint?"
No man can buy a Nutrageous
No man can have a crease in his jeans
No man can tell another man he has "fresh breath"
No man can text a chick saying, "You hurt my feelings by not answering my call"
No man can tell another man that he dropped something, then watch him pick it up
If you're in the ATL this weekend check me out at SugarHill in the Underground this Sunday May 3rd from 7-9pm. Snack Pack Improv Comedy. Click the link to check out the last show. Hit me for advance tix.
http://vimeo.com/4002015
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Man Law Monday
4/20 Edition
No man can look into another man's eyes while licking the blunt shut
No man can ask another man to teach him to blow "smoke holes"
No man can text another man: Happy 420 :-P
No man can stick an entire cigar in his mouth to produce wetness
No man can tell another man "I feel comfortable smoking around you"
No man can smoke out of a pipe that is long, hard, and has a tiny hole on one end with a round bulb on the other
No man can blow another man a shotgun
No two men can get high and say "Ay man, we should go swimming"
No man can get high and discuss his love life with another man
No man can smoke a blunt with his legs crossed
Thank You
No man can look into another man's eyes while licking the blunt shut
No man can ask another man to teach him to blow "smoke holes"
No man can text another man: Happy 420 :-P
No man can stick an entire cigar in his mouth to produce wetness
No man can tell another man "I feel comfortable smoking around you"
No man can smoke out of a pipe that is long, hard, and has a tiny hole on one end with a round bulb on the other
No man can blow another man a shotgun
No two men can get high and say "Ay man, we should go swimming"
No man can get high and discuss his love life with another man
No man can smoke a blunt with his legs crossed
Thank You
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Man Law Monday
No 2 men can ride in a 2 seater convertible
No man can use Sweet and Low
No man can purchase shoestrings that match his outfit
No man can wear sterling silver
No man can wonder if condoms can be recycled
No man can have a birthday cake after the age of 12
No man can be on the "Subway and Jarrett" diet
No man should have an argument with a woman via text and use ALL CAPS
No man can still wear a G-Unit wife beater
No man can tell other men to "follow him on Twitter"
Thank You
No man can use Sweet and Low
No man can purchase shoestrings that match his outfit
No man can wear sterling silver
No man can wonder if condoms can be recycled
No man can have a birthday cake after the age of 12
No man can be on the "Subway and Jarrett" diet
No man should have an argument with a woman via text and use ALL CAPS
No man can still wear a G-Unit wife beater
No man can tell other men to "follow him on Twitter"
Thank You
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can purchase fruit cocktail
No man can put on his hazard lights in the rain
No man can leave the top 3 buttons on his shirt unbuttoned
No man can be nervous about meeting another man
No man can get his feet pumiced
No man can have a favorite pair of drawers
No man can bring another man a magnet back from vacation
No man can request a special cake for his birthday
No man can request extra jelly
No man can pee through the hole in his tighty whities
No man can put on his hazard lights in the rain
No man can leave the top 3 buttons on his shirt unbuttoned
No man can be nervous about meeting another man
No man can get his feet pumiced
No man can have a favorite pair of drawers
No man can bring another man a magnet back from vacation
No man can request a special cake for his birthday
No man can request extra jelly
No man can pee through the hole in his tighty whities
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can accidentally draw a flower while doodling
No man can doodle
No 2 men can have an inside joke
No man can be so happy that he runs in place
No man can put his foot up on the wait bench Captain Morgan style while spotting a male friend
No man can get the top of his ear pierced
No man can cross his hair to where his hamstrings touch his knee
No 2 men can have a non-business joint account
No man can have a job at Wet Seal
No man can take longer than 20 minutes to get dressed, and that includes showering
No man can doodle
No 2 men can have an inside joke
No man can be so happy that he runs in place
No man can put his foot up on the wait bench Captain Morgan style while spotting a male friend
No man can get the top of his ear pierced
No man can cross his hair to where his hamstrings touch his knee
No 2 men can have a non-business joint account
No man can have a job at Wet Seal
No man can take longer than 20 minutes to get dressed, and that includes showering
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Man Law Monday
No 2 men can plan a trip to the Caribbean together
No man can say "it's a beatiful day outside"
No man can cut his eye at another man
No man can know the phone # by heart to American Idol
No man can compliment another man on the whiteness of his teeth
No man can do a full body roll if dancing at the club (PM)
No man can use a picture of his favorite dress shoe as his profile
No man can have shorts or sweats w/ anything written on the ass
No man can sing into his body wash bottle in the shower
No man can sit with both knees up on the couch
No man can say "it's a beatiful day outside"
No man can cut his eye at another man
No man can know the phone # by heart to American Idol
No man can compliment another man on the whiteness of his teeth
No man can do a full body roll if dancing at the club (PM)
No man can use a picture of his favorite dress shoe as his profile
No man can have shorts or sweats w/ anything written on the ass
No man can sing into his body wash bottle in the shower
No man can sit with both knees up on the couch
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can drop something and say "oops"
No man can hug his pillow tight at night
No man can wear a single hoop earring unless you are Michael Jordan or a Genie
No man can ask another man to cook him his favorite dish
No man can say "I love being in the locker room"
No man can be mad that the show "Girlfriends" is no longer on the air
No man can complain about the way his feet look in sandals
No man can cry after watching Seven pounds
No man can own a dildo that doesnt smell like vagina
Thank you
No man can hug his pillow tight at night
No man can wear a single hoop earring unless you are Michael Jordan or a Genie
No man can ask another man to cook him his favorite dish
No man can say "I love being in the locker room"
No man can be mad that the show "Girlfriends" is no longer on the air
No man can complain about the way his feet look in sandals
No man can cry after watching Seven pounds
No man can own a dildo that doesnt smell like vagina
Thank you
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can try on a pair of jeans and look at his ass in the mirror to see how it fits
No man can tell another man "come here, I got a secret"
No 2 men can do their "special handshake" at the club
No man can read another man's lips for too long
No man wear a bluetooth if it is dangling from his ear (BK)
No man can be on the Hollywood Diet
No man can let out only silent farts
No man can order Strawberries w/ Chocolate sauce
No man can shave his legs to his thigh to make his legs look good in shorts
No man can have hard nipples
No man can tell another man "come here, I got a secret"
No 2 men can do their "special handshake" at the club
No man can read another man's lips for too long
No man wear a bluetooth if it is dangling from his ear (BK)
No man can be on the Hollywood Diet
No man can let out only silent farts
No man can order Strawberries w/ Chocolate sauce
No man can shave his legs to his thigh to make his legs look good in shorts
No man can have hard nipples
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can watch a football game and go "mmmm"
No man can request to have his scalp greased
No two men can have a snowball fight
No man can grab the remote off another man's lap
No man can have a conversation in the men's bathroom
No man can put "it's complicated" as their relationship status
No man can cup his hand when doing the celebratory butt pat during a game
No man can drive a Dodge Neon
No man can know directions to a gay club
No man can wear oven mits for more than 5 minutes at a time
Thank You
No man can request to have his scalp greased
No two men can have a snowball fight
No man can grab the remote off another man's lap
No man can have a conversation in the men's bathroom
No man can put "it's complicated" as their relationship status
No man can cup his hand when doing the celebratory butt pat during a game
No man can drive a Dodge Neon
No man can know directions to a gay club
No man can wear oven mits for more than 5 minutes at a time
Thank You
Friday, February 27, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can order Harvest Grain Pancakes w/ fruit garnish (DN)
No man can share an armrest on a plane with another man
No man can call himself or another man "shawty"
No man can tell another man he needs to lick his lips
No man can be afraid of thunder
No man can ask another man to scratch a "hard to reach" area
No man can ponder putting a relaxer in his hair to make conrows easier to take
No man can give another man his own personal ringtone (SA)
No man can wear socks with the furry ball on the back
No man can wear Reebok Classics
Thank you
No man can share an armrest on a plane with another man
No man can call himself or another man "shawty"
No man can tell another man he needs to lick his lips
No man can be afraid of thunder
No man can ask another man to scratch a "hard to reach" area
No man can ponder putting a relaxer in his hair to make conrows easier to take
No man can give another man his own personal ringtone (SA)
No man can wear socks with the furry ball on the back
No man can wear Reebok Classics
Thank you
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Man Law Monday
No man can wear a watch with a skinny band on his right wrist
No man can have an action figure collection
No man can wear dress shoes with the back or the toes out
No man can wear a sweater with no undershirt
No man can let the juice from fruit run down his mouth
No man can bend over in the shower...if you drop your rag...its just dropped, or try and pick it up like an eagle would its prey
No man can wear mid calf socks
No man can take a camera phone picture of John Legend at a concert
No man can wear a Tall T and boxers to bed
No man can have an action figure collection
No man can wear dress shoes with the back or the toes out
No man can wear a sweater with no undershirt
No man can let the juice from fruit run down his mouth
No man can bend over in the shower...if you drop your rag...its just dropped, or try and pick it up like an eagle would its prey
No man can wear mid calf socks
No man can take a camera phone picture of John Legend at a concert
No man can wear a Tall T and boxers to bed
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
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