Thursday, May 7, 2009

Sex Positions

Here we go...these are some new sex positions that I created...the male version (pause). Female version coming next week. Thanks.

Pencil Sharpener- Lay your woman face up on the bed, stick it in...then have her spin around while spitting sawdust out of her mouth

MJ- Hold on to the ceiling light with one hand while standing like the Jordan Jumpman logo and get head

Jack in the Box- Download 'Pop Goes the Weasel' on your cell phone, play it while hitting it from the back, and when the song reaches the 'pop' portion...dry thumb in her ass

Get High-wrap your lady in a brown garbage bag like a blunt, leaving only her head exposed, light the end by her feet on fire while receiving head

Tooth Fairy- take a pillow wherever you go and when you say "toothfairy" she has to stick her head under the pillow...and you guessed it...give head

The Elevator- Right before you reach the top(climax) fart and leave the room

The Ant Eater (Uncircumsized Users Only)- place raisins on your mates stomach and act as if your dick is eating ants...then insert

The Stanky 3rd Leg- Raw sex immediately after competing in a sports event

10 on Pump 5- Go raw, don't pull out til you shook out the last drop

The Ninja- Throw babypowder in your mates eyes...then steal the pussy

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